So You Wanna Be More Spiritual? 4 Things That Helped Me Be More Connected

I think the number one thing clients asked me is “how do I be more spiritually connected?” I think the truth of the matter is we all want to feel like our intuition is valid and we'd like to have it validated. Having that little voice in your ear in times of uncertainty, can make all the difference. Knowing without a reasonable doubt that something is right or wrong, can feel amazing. But in real life it’s not always so cut and dry. We all have off days, we all have high and low energy days, we all have times when no matter what we do our old coping mechanisms don’t quite make the cut. Nothing can prevent us from living the human experience but being more spiritually connected certainly can help us navigate better.

So how do we get more connected? Well, the answer is not complicated, but it’s not fun or sexy. Here are three things I have done to be more spiritually connected: 

A spiritual hygiene routine:

Spiritual hygiene is defined as the various methods and modalities we can use to mitigate, remove, and rebalance the energies absorbed by the physical body. Just as physical hygiene maintains physical health, spiritual hygiene fosters emotional, mental, and energetic well-being. It involves practices that cleanse, balance, and purify the energy absorbed by the physical body. In my expertise it takes cleansing, grounding and protection work with a healthy helping of energy transmutation or literally putting undesirable energy into something else or turning un-useful energy into something useful.

You might see in various places on the internet that spiritual hygiene is just meditation, prayer and journaling. And to that I say NO, it’s not. Spiritual hygiene and a lot of other spiritual work requires action and learning, it’s more than just the “new age” version of “thoughts and prayers.” Spiritual hygiene are things like limpias— or energy cleanses— going into nature, things like pranic healing and reiki, Korean bath houses or just day spays in general provide spiritual hygiene because they change the energy you carry with various waters, stones, crystals, salts, heat, cold, etc. —That's the sauce.

For me limpias were the game changer, but not just doing them, I also had the work of figuring out what type of limpia I needed for which occasion. In my 20s I couldn’t go anywhere there were too many people because I would come home with spirits following me and with a bunch of energy that didn’t belong to me. I was absorbing everything and there was no outlet. When I became more diligent about my cleansing, grounding and protection rituals it cut down the “people hangovers” (coming home energetically drained after being around lots of people) and prevented the energies and spirits from sticking. I was finally able to live my life and have some energy because I was constantly exhausted. 

For anyone interested I’m offering Spiritual Hygiene 101 Workshop May 3rd and 4th to learn various limpias, how to make smudging sprays, what altars you need and much more.

Following your intuition:

One thing people seem to be confused about is if the feelings and sensations they have are anxiety, intuition, traumas, or spirit messages. Limpias and spiritual hygiene in general, will help give you the clarity you need to figure out what's happening in your body and where you feel the messages. I call these intuition zones, which are the different spots in the body where messages about spirit or surroundings show up. Don’t forget your body is a measurement tool to perceive the world around you, that's why it’s so important to be grounded and settled in our bodies. The whole point of developing this area of our spirituality is to be able to hear the guidance with more certainty. The easiest way to start is to just do it. If you feel like you shouldn’t go to a place or say yes to someone-- don’t do it. If you’re walking home and for some reason you want to take a way you don’t usually take, go! You might find a blessing, you might avoid something tragic, who knows. But you won’t know until you try it. It’s as simple and as difficult as just following your feelings.

Don’t betray yourself:

If you know that going to a certain place is not good for you emotionally or physically— and you feel like you shouldn’t go and you go anyway— that's self betrayal. If you feel like something isn’t right but you keep going along with it because someone else said it was ok— that’s self betrayal. If you are in a relationship that isn’t healthy or supportive— that’s self betrayal. If you want guidance and then refuse to follow the messages they’re going to stop coming. If you ask your guides and ancestors to bless you but don’t listen, don’t give gratitude, and don’t give offerings— the answer is going to be no. Similarly your guides will never help you go in the wrong direction. For instance, praying for a job that's not right for you or a relationship that’s terrible for you will never give what you want it to give. Staying where you aren’t thriving, giving too much, or have a lack of boundaries is generally where we get stuck when we’re trying to “be more spiritual.” If you are stuck on something that you can’t seem to get then consider that it’s not for you, it’s capitalism that tells us that when something isn’t working to try harder and harder and harder until you smash it. In real life that’s a sign it’s not right and that perhaps you should try something else. Also if you’re looking for guidance but want to do the thing you are stuck on no matter what, you don’t actually want guidance you want spirit to co-sign your choices and that’s not how this works. You can’t accept the thing you say you don’t want and expect your life to go differently. 

Connecting with ancestors or guides:

Connecting with guides is the sauce. Be that your ancestors, angels, or saints— that connection is where the guidance is at. And why do we want guidance? Because they know more than us and because that's where our intuition comes from. It’s them being like “HELLO!” The best way to connect with ancestors and guides is to give offerings, light candles, and burn incense for them. If you’re trying to get on their good side, give more than you ask for, in fact refrain from asking for anything for a while until you have a good rapport going with them. This can mean building your own altar, lighting candles at church or at least doing some form of remembrance.

The most simple altar is this: somewhere it won’t be disturbed put a photo or statue or item or your deity or ancestor, etc— a white candle and a glass of water. You can also put white flowers. Light the candle and say the appropriate prayers for them. For example if it’s for St Francis, say the prayers that are specifically for him and give him offerings he’s known for liking. If it’s an ancestor that was Catholic say the prayers they liked or that are common you can’t go wrong with Our Fathers and Hail Mary’s. And make sure you’d giving them the food they liked. A sign they want offerings is when you’re cooking or eating and you keep dropping food morsels on the floor. There is no point in giving things they don’t like or saying prayers they didn’t ask for.